It's been a long day. One I didn't expect to come. I thought Justin would be home, and I thought I would have kids to babysit all day. After tucking the kids in bed and feeling a little grumpy tonight, I've thought about how mad and frustrated I feel that Justin is still stuck in Cleveland and how my day that just happened was not planned. It doesn't seem quite fair. I was especially sad when I just got off the phone with a friend that was heading out the door to go to Ward Temple night with her husband. In tears, I wished that was me.
As quick as these sad, dark feelings came, they've now vanished. I realize sitting here that it's the gospel in my life that makes me happy. I purposely throw myself into Service when I'm feeling down, and every time it turns around to make me feel better. I have every intention to help someone else or make a situation better for a friend and I feel like every time it just feeds me instead. This very thing is talked about week after week at church, but I recognize it's power in my life at this moment.
I am grateful for tough times, or moments I wouldn't have planned for myself; these times stretch me and strengthen me. I can sure think of a lot of reasons why I wish Justin was here more, but I also see so many reasons of why he's not. I've met wonderful people, he's met wonderful people and things have happened I won't mention here that are a blessing. I'll just say that Service is my light right now. I love filling my time outside of myself; it fills me in the end.
3 comments:
Sorry to hear about your crazy day! It's a tought thing to have Justin gone a lot isn't it? I know he wished he was there with you rather than stuck in Cleveland.
You are always such an inspiration to me at how well you can turn a bad situtation good. I am amazed how you handle so many days without your husband.
It's always tough when you don't get that 2nd-parent help when you're expecting it, isn't it? You have a great attitude, though; and, I know that you are one strong woman. Hang in there!
Post a Comment